Pogue's Ponderings: 'Special' bond between father, son reaches 21st year
By Greg Pogue


Posted on January 1, 0001 12:00 AM



Having grown up the son of a high school basketball coach, it was inevitable sports would be a large part of my life.

It worked out that way, too, having shunned the big money of coaching for the bigger money of sports writing and broadcasting (insert laughter here). Having been gainfully employed and self-sufficient in a variety of ways over three-plus decades, I guess that worked out.

Earlier this year on a cold Saturday night in mid-February, Dad and I watched Vanderbilt play Kentucky from his hospital room. We both knew it would be the last basketball game we would watch together.

We smiled and laughed and cried and hugged. All the while, we were dissecting the coaching and playing – and, yes, the officiating -- during the game, just like we had done as father the coach and son the student since the first time I ever saw him coach a game way back when.

The passing of my father earlier this year hits home from time to time. And it also makes me realize how distinctly different the relationship is between me and my only son Clay, who turns 21 today.

Clay was 4 when wife Robin and I learned about Fragile X Syndrome. The diagnosis came out of left field, and we soon learned just how special Clay would be to us and daughter/sister Grace for the remainder of our lives.

Healthy and happy, Clay can’t add one and one and get two, but he sure can program the DVD for Dad and tell you Milwaukee Brewers star Ryan Braun is his favorite baseball player. Just so happens, he’s mine, too. Funny how that works out, huh?

Unlike my father did with me, I didn’t get to coach or watch Clay play youth or high school sports. Clay and I don’t sit around and break down fundamentals of sports or talk about that big game coming up.

But what we do share is a bond when it comes to baseball. We noticed Clay’s love of the sport early on when he started mimicking the home plate umpire. Soon, we made sure he had a mask, counter, ball bag and plate brush.

These days, Clay is styling and profiling and has the full ritual down. Thanks to veteran Major League Baseball umpire Chuck Meriwether, who lives in Nashville, he looks the part, too.

I am guessing there aren’t many young men watching baseball games in their den while wearing the official garb of MLB umpires. Today, Meriwether gave me to give to Clay the blazer he wore during his MLB games. Clay had noticed the umpire had gone to the blazer for colder weather.

Clay knows an imposter, too, because of that ever-present MLB logo which my son has learned to discern. Imagine that, my son a snob when it comes to wearing umpire garb. He only wears the real deal. And he can bellow a strike call with the best of them.


There has been plenty of live baseball, too, like watching MTSU and the Nashville Sounds, plus road trips to Miller Park in Milwaukee, Great American Ball Park in Cincinnati, Wrigley Field in Chicago and Turner Field in Atlanta.

Clay likes other sports, too. He is a fan of Kasey Kahne, if only because he was the favorite driver of a special person who befriended him. And he likes the Predators and Titans and MTSU and Vanderbilt, too.

Notice, there is no Tennessee in there. Talk to the spouse, a Kentucky fan, about the ban on orange.

I bet Clay has more sports T-shirts than anyone else who currently attends Smyrna High School. Yes, Clay can attend special education classes there through next school year, and he wouldn’t have it any other way.

Clay loves Smyrna High. And those teachers and fellow students at Smyrna who know Clay knows how special he is. Each night, he decides which sports T-shirt he will wear to school the next day.

Clay and I didn’t share the world of sports like I did with my father or most fathers do with their sons. But Clay and I share our world of sports unlike any others.

As we celebrate his 21st birthday today, I won’t fret the parts of life I might have missed or will miss with my son. I will tell you, however, how much I rejoice experiencing something unique and wonderful named Clay.

Knowing what I know now, I wouldn’t have had it any other way.

 

Greg Pogue is host of The Wendy’s First Quarter on 102.5-FM The Game ESPN Radio Nashville. E-mail him at GregPogue@1025thegame.com. He is the son of retired educator Nannie Ruth Pogue and the late Gordon Pogue.


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